Treasures scattered far and wide,
Through the sandy shore;
Solitude becomes the tide,
Bringing peace once more.
A perfect place for you to hide,
Dissolve into the Blue;
Your soul as deep as hers is wide,
The ocean welcomes you.
Author: Spiritual Heretic
2010 Reblog: Be impeccable with your word…
Impeccable: flawless, incapable of sinning, perfect.
It’s one of the hardest of the agreements to follow and maintain because of human nature. We all get upset from time to time and vent to other people about the problems we experience in our lives with others. If we misunderstand a situation, or if we are at fault and don’t want to believe it, we project the fault onto the other person in our conversations with our friends. We are looking for someone to justify or rationalize our already incorrect feelings. We don’t really want the truth – we just want to be validated. And most people in our lives take on our projected opinion of the person who has hurt us or uspet us, even if they’ve never met them.
A wise person will suspend judgment no matter what is said.
When someone comes to you in order to vent about a situation or person in their lives that is bothering them – don’t take on their anger and use that to form an opinion about the person who has hurt them.
Anyway, just because I see a situation as unhealthy doesn’t mean I think terribly of anyone involved. An unhealthy situation is pretty easy to spot. But it takes two to tango, and some circumstances in separate lives just don’t mix well. No matter how much we want to hang onto those situations and people… they aren’t healthy situations to hang onto. Sometimes you just have to let go when you can’t fix it.
If you find yourself in a situation where everyone around you has formed negative opinions of people they’ve never met – ask yourself why. Ask yourself to pay attention next time to the way you present the situation – the way you talk about the people involved – and more often than not, you’ll find that you are the direct cause of those negative opinions.
If you constantly talk down about people, parade them out to be horrible people who are out to get you, out to hurt you, and are completely unstable and questionable people… chances are people in your life are going to believe you and form a similar opinion. And when you backpedal and say, “oh wait, never mind, they’re not that way at all!” people will have a hard time believing you after all that you’ve said.
So that’s why it’s important to be impeccable with your word. We all need to practice this. It doesn’t just affect our own lives, it affects everyone around us, too.
2010 Reblog: There is a reason for everything I say and do.
All it takes is one person to taint someone else’s perception of a situation. We are all just reiterating someone else’s story. Someone else’s lies. We are all storytellers in this world, and when we experience something we interpret that and reflect it back into the world in such a way that may or may not be real. Then, others take our stories, change them to fit their perspective and retell them. And the cycle continues. There is no such thing as first hand information. Everything is misunderstood to an extent.
Don’t believe anybody. Not even yourself But listen. Listen to them, learn to listen but don’t believe. Everyone is telling a story that is true for them – and what they say may not be true for anyone else. Perception shapes everything. Especially negative perceptions. Your outlook on life is going to shape the way you perceive the people in your life and what they have to say.
When people speak to you, you have no idea who is speaking through them. Is it them? Their heart? Their integrity? Or is it the prince of lies who lives inside their head? The liar that lives inside their head who is constantly telling them they aren’t good enough, strong enough, smart enough, pretty enough… really, who is it speaking through them? Are they angry? Hurt? How much of their emotional state of mind is shaping what they say and who they talk about?
Learn to listen without judging them. Sometimes they don’t know it’s their perspective on life that is causing them to lie.
2010 Reblog: “Whenever I have to justify, the truth I speak to you becomes my white lie.”
The world we experience through absorption of energy directly in the moment is not the world we describe to the people in our lives. Words build walls that keep the depth and real meaning from passing through. Everything important seems to be lost in translation. It’s not possible to translate in whole what the heart feels through words. What is felt must be felt. That is the ultimate truth. All words are lies, somewhere, to someone.
Words are a form of linear communication. Whether they are spoken, written or read silently – their messages are conveyed in a linear fashion to describe events of the past… as opposed to pure absorption of a situation which can only be done in the moment. Not before and not afterward.
Words are always a lie to someone. Words taint the truth. Words are just tools to communicate knowledge and we all know that knowledge is just a collection of other people’s stories reiterated and memorized by other storytellers. Words describe moments which have passed – they can never describe the present moment simply because by the time words are spoken or expressed, the moment has passed, and will never be again.
Without words there can be no lies. The only way to experience pure, untainted truth, is to experience each moment WITHIN the moment, silently…
When we absorb a moment in our lives our heart allows us to experience it in full on the inside. Silently. Privately. We absorb every detail. Our thoughts race in a non-linear fashion in ways indescribable to others. We aren’t afraid to think and feel the depth that presents itself to us. But on the outside, other people demand “knowledge” of what we have experienced. That’s what creates the problem. We want to be able to tell others what our heart feels but we can’t for so many reasons. First, we cannot accurately translate feelings to words simply because emotions have to be felt to be fully understood. Words, when expressed to others, will automatically be interpreted based on an individual’s life experiences. People relate our words to their life experience, not ours. So already words become a barrier of complications that actually prevent people from really understanding what we’ve experienced in our heart.
When you love someone in this moment – right now – yesterday shouldn’t matter and tomorrow shouldn’t exist.
Words are what directly cause misunderstandings and lead to the lies we all tell each other. When we feel what’s inside someone else’s heart through absorption, we can’t possibly misinterpret absolute truth. The heart never lies. It’s only when we use words to try to explain to people what we feel that things fall apart. We feel pressure to meet expectations and when we can’t meet them we feel shame, guilt and sometimes embarrassment. We feel pressure to gain approval from others, and, based on the idea that people won’t like us or accept us unless we do what -they- want… sometimes we try to change our behavior to fit what we believe other people want from us. We let others take advantage of us and we lose our innate ability to stand up for ourselves because we become conditioned to please others above all else.
Is it too idealistic to want to have the opportunity to absorb the truth of what is in each others hearts? When are we actually able to absorb the truth the heart speaks? The reality is we don’t always get that chance with everyone, unfortunately. The only way is for others to provide us with that chance – and vice versa. Not everyone is comfortable with that.
When we use words to describe to people what we feel, they become confused if we can’t explain it to their satisfaction or expectations. Perhaps our words don’t match what they view as their contribution to our lives. Not by any fault of our own… but the failure of our choice of words to be powerful enough to convey the depth of what we feel in our hearts might cause people to feel not good enough, like they’ve failed somehow…
Thus exaggeration is born. Telling people what they want to hear. Sometimes honestly believing that it’s truth simply because we want it to be truth.
Daily conversation is just a form of communicating knowledge. Knowledge is always tainted to some degree. It’s as though the world is playing a constant game of “telephone” but there are no operators waiting to help us determine truth from fiction in our own lives let alone anyone else’s.
And once we’ve been conditioned to transform our own feelings, deny what our heart feels, cover up our true emotions… all because other people hold us to impossible expectations and demand words from us… we embody the lie that becomes our truth.
“Whenever I have to justify,
The truth I speak to you becomes my white lie…”
Once we lie, we feel the need to apologize when it is discovered. But what are apologies? They are just more confusing, complicated words. But they shouldn’t be. Apologies should be delivered unspoken, untainted… as pure communication from one heart to another. For most people – apologies are never enough. Why? Because they’re just words.
The best apologies are not really apologies at all and are non-verbal expressions of truth. Once the truth is known, is an apology really necessary? Non-verbal apologies don’t allow us to hold onto our anger. Why? Because once we feel what is in someone else’s heart we cannot hold onto our anger anymore. The direct result of absorption of the truth is that it replaces the past instantaneously.
What happens when someone doesn’t accept our apology?
Unaccepted apologies are a way of saying the right combination of words and actions has not been expressed; our expectations have not been met. We force people to keep trying and trying until they’ve said the right thing at the right time even though it’s never enough for most people. It’s never enough because it’s not real. Words are not real. But when you apologize through absorption and transference of energy – when you speak FROM the heart TO the heart – it leaves no chance of being unaccepted simply because the heart cannot reject the truth of what another heart feels.
2020 Reblog: simplicity
Emotions directly affect the physical structure of our DNA. That structure of our DNA directly shapes the physical world we experience.
I tend to forget that these events are a mirror for me to see what I need to cleanse within myself – internally.
It’s not there for me to fight externally. It’s there for me to conquer inwardly.
They’re my mirror; I am theirs.
It’s really that simple.
2010 Reblog: standing.outside.a.broken.phonebooth.with.money.in.my.hand.
it’s not just the sound of the ocean which comforts me.
it’s the idea of her depth remaining unknown to me no matter how deeply i swim.
it’s the mystery which surrounds her beautiful tide breaking in harmony with the music inside my head…
contrary to the rest – i find joy in not knowing everything. mystery serves a purpose, you know.
i find joy in sharing beautiful people and experiences with others rather than chaining them to experience only that which exists in my world. when someone makes me feel wonderful – i wish for everyone in their life to be able to experience that piece of their soul so they may feel as good as i do.
it’s time to start over. from the end. because with the end comes a new beginning.
//
Originally published January 18, 2020.
12-year cycle?
Be.
For a short time, I lost myself in a sea of quicksand, trying to defend myself against lies that only made me sink deeper. In the end, I came back to center. And here is my mantra:
“I am so in tune with who I am at the core of my being and with unconditional love that I allow others to Be even when they don’t allow me.”
Yes. This.
Conversation with a Psychopath.
This is a conversation I had in 2004 with an 18-year-old high school senior that I never realized was a psychopath until many years later after studying psychopathy in-depth.
He was aware that he had a problem with feeling compelled to kill people and was aware that if someone didn’t stop him he would murder someone just for the thrill. He had been experiencing urges to mutilate people and watch them bleed since he was in kindergarten.
While he was spilling his guts I played it cool and let him talk until I could find information on him online to find out what school he attended. I found it, contacted the superintendent, and she laughed and told me to prank someone else and hung up so I found his principal’s home number and called him that evening. He didn’t want to believe it. He was convinced this kid had reformed his ways and was doing well because he was working with him personally on a daily basis… just another manipulation.
The scary part is, the principal did not take immediate action and waited 2 days to call the police. The kid barely spent any time in jail, they did not search his home, and he was able to burn his diaries and get rid of his dynamite and continue absorbing himself in violent fantasies.
Note: I gave the principal all of the chat logs in the gallery below that occurred prior to his arrest. Once you read these chats, you’ll be shocked at the fact that the principal waited to take action and this kid was let off the hook.
At the time, I thought he was just an angry kid with a sadistic streak who didn’t want to own his actions. I didn’t realize he was being manipulative and that he was a psychopath.
In hindsight, it’s easy to see his manipulation. He went from spilling his guts to me without reservation, to blaming me for his arrest after finding out I reported him and claiming I linked him to a website that told him how to make bombs (I did not)…
Then, he switched to praising me for giving him the opportunity for a new life and sharing his ideas for a new life, thanking me for saving his life, and when I was no longer convenient to him he denied knowing me, tossing me out like yesterday’s trash.
This is typical psychopathic behavior.
I’ve encountered many people who literally idolize the Columbine shooters over the years, but nobody comes close to this kid. He has since been arrested for petty crimes many times since his first arrest and I would not be surprised if he ended up hurting someone. He’s currently serving time in jail for theft and we are not in contact.
//
Many people have asked me for “proof” that I’ve prevented school shootings, including “Bill Ockham,” who claims I supported and encouraged teenagers to shoot up their schools. I have no idea why people think my life experiences are made up of lies, but there should be no question in anyone’s mind about the matter after reading these 76 pages of conversations with one of the individuals I reported for making threats.
The following 76 screen shots are from conversations we had over AOL. I saved the conversations as screen shots, which I transcribed, and at other times I copy/pasted the conversations directly into Word. I combined everything into one document and took screen shots.
The following content is GRAPHIC, so proceed with caution if you’re sensitive.
The 11 Stages of Communication on Social Media
This is how a typical conversation goes on social media. If you’re lucky, someone will respond to the content in your post. Most people aren’t that lucky.
1. Make your point.
You: “The cow jumped over the moon.”
2. Field irrelevant responses.
Someone: “Cows are dumb.”
You: “Yes, Bob, some cows are dumb. But being smart is not a prerequisite for moon-jumping.”
3. Clarify your point for people who misunderstood your point.
Someone: “I disagree. Nobody should be putting moons in their pasture, that’s animal cruelty making a cow jump over a moon to get to the feed bin.”
You: “Well, that’s not exactly what I’m saying. Nobody placed a moon inside the pasture. The cow was actually wandering around in space and found the moon and decided to jump over for fun.”
4. Question how humans have survived this long.
Someone: “Well, that’s still animal cruelty. You’re an idiot for letting your cow wander around in space.”
You: How did we even get here??
5. Answer questions from people who request clarification to better understand your point.
No one:
6. Field comments from social justice warriors.
Someone: “It doesn’t matter if the cow made her own choice to jump over the moon. It’s still an effect of institutionalized heiferism. Since the dawn of time, only the heifers have been jumping over the moon.
They wouldn’t jump over the moon if the world wasn’t seeded with anti-cow narratives controlled by the left. It’s udderly ridiculous to think that a cow can make her own choice to jump over the moon. They’re being enslaved by the patriarchy.”
You: “Well, we can certainly talk about the cow patriarchy, but I’m pretty sure the cow was just feeling inspired by the cat’s fiddle-playing and you know, jumped for joy.”
7. Field comments from The Contrarians.
Someone: “Why are we even talking about cows? Who cares if they jump over the moon? And if they do, you need to provide proof – pics or it didn’t happen!”
You: “Alrighty then.”
8. Field comments from the deep thinkers.
Someone: “Cows don’t always jump over the moon. I knew a cow once and it never jumped over anything, not even a stick. I understand what you’re trying to say here, but you have to understand, some cows aren’t going to jump over the moon. It’s just not in their nature. Psychologically, cows prefer to stay close to the ground.
The chances of a cow jumping over anything are slim, like 1 in 1,000,000. I know because I have a Ph.D. in Cowology. So, speak for your own cows. My cows would never commit such a useless act.”
You: “Cool, so, I’m talking about my cow that jumped over the moon…”
9. Try to bring the conversation back on point.
You: “I understand that not all cows jump over the moon, but like, my cow did jump over the moon and I’d like to share that experience.”
Everyone:
10. Meet up with someone in person.
Someone: “Oh, hey, I saw your post about the jumping cow.”
You: “Yeah, I don’t want to talk about it.”
11. Get in a time machine and go back to the 1980s before social media existed.
What If Anti-Bullying Campaigns Are Disempowering Our Youth?
With school shootings and teen suicide constantly in our awareness, asking “why?” is a trail that almost always leads to bullying. As a result, the effort to combat bullying in schools has been substantial. Schools across the U.S. have enacted zero tolerance policies with consequences for even the slightest infraction.
These punishments are designed to deter students from treating each other poorly. It kind of makes sense. Kids sometimes change their behavior to avoid unwanted consequences. But punishment doesn’t change someone’s mindset. Worse, anti-bullying programs are hiding a dark secret, invisible even to those who create the programs.
Anti-bullying programs create witch hunts
Anti-bullying programs are founded on the principal of “see something, say something.” However, students are encouraged to report anyone who makes them feel bad. Today’s kids really believe words are violence and feel equally attacked by criticism as a punch in the face.
Because kids are encouraged to report every small comment that makes them feel bad, these programs end up working somewhat like the witch hunts hundreds of years ago. You know, where people were tortured, imprisoned, and killed without a chance to defend themselves.
Anti-bullying campaigns work similarly. There’s no mediated conversation between the accused and accuser. Punishments – including suspensions – are dished out without due process. When administrators can’t figure out who started it, everyone with a finger pointed in their face gets punished.
In order for these “see something, say something” anti-bullying programs to work, administrators must take students at their word. This conditions students to be tattle-tales, reporting every minor word and gesture that makes them feel uncomfortable.
Kids today are growing up like fragile, porcelain dolls, unable to withstand the reality that not everyone is going to like them. And we’re not giving them the skills to develop self-worth, either. Instead, we’re training them to abdicate responsibility while they hide behind administrators, snickering because they can get their enemies in trouble without getting their hands dirty.
Zero tolerance doesn’t change a hostile school culture
Zero tolerance programs require no evidence before punishing students. But how can there even be evidence that someone’s been bullied? Often, incidents take place in a split-second and go unnoticed to those even just a few feet away. Most notably, It’s the administrators that have the hardest time recognizing evidence of bullying. A hostile school culture obvious to students isn’t so obvious to administrators who think it’s normal.
For example, in January of this year, a student from Lebanon High School in Tennessee created an anti-bullying video in response to a classmate’s suicide the previous October. She describes her school culture as an “emotional prison” that smashes creativity and doesn’t punish perpetrators of abuse because, as administrators say, “kids will be kids.” She was suspended for two days for “trying to incite violence.”
The principal publicly diminished her experience by saying, “I can appreciate her perspective of the video. Of course, she’s 16, and her perspective is going to be different from mine.” In other words, her perspective is invalid; she’s not really experiencing oppression and abuse. The principal’s response perfectly demonstrates the school culture she rails against in her video.
Bullying is an infinite cycle of reaction
Zero tolerance programs have one agenda: bullies must be punished. But the kid who just spit in someone’s face is the same kid who got beat up three days ago for being gay. The kid who called someone fat five minutes ago is the same kid the star football player forced to push a penny across the bathroom floor with his nose. And the girl who just pulled another student to the ground by her hair is the same student whose art project was vandalized last week.
Bullying is an infinite cycle where students are reacting to circumstances in their life, sometimes from school and sometimes from home. You’ll find nearly everyone to be a “bully” depending on where you drop in on the cycle.
The dark secret: administrators don’t know how to prevent bullying
These zero tolerance anti-bullying campaigns are being implemented in school because administrators have no idea how to prevent bullying. All they know how to do is punish students they catch acting out. To prevent bullying, you have to transform the entire school culture from the inside out. And nobody knows how to do that better than Erahm Christopher and JC Pohl – two filmmakers who have been bringing a life-changing presentation to schools for over twelve years.
Teen Truth isn’t your average school assembly. It’s not a motivational speech. It’s an interactive conversation that empowers students to handle social-emotional issues and to be the difference on campus and in their lives. Their presentation covers issues many students face in their private lives that causes them to act out.
Bullying, drugs, self-esteem, and family communication are all topics of conversation. The program features student stories about overcoming adversity, self-acceptance, coping with sexual differences, handling social media drama, and what leadership really means.
Based on the hugs and tears during these presentations – including hugs between students who don’t even know each other – I’d say it’s far more effective at bringing students together than a witch hunt. What do you think?