By holding onto the past rather than flowing with the changes in our lives and the lives of others around us, we actually create our own discomfort and pain.

We mistakenly believe that the changes that occur separate us from what we know and love and we wonder why things have to change… why can’t things just stay the same so we can be happy? But it’s not the changes that prevent us from being happy. It’s our failure to live in the moment and accept the changes as gradual that creates our unhappiness and eventually leads to our feelings of alienation and unfamiliarity.

We spend so much time holding onto things which quickly become the past and as things gradually change around us, we don’t perceive it as gradual change. Once things start changing, we cling to how things were day and night, night and day… and while the world around us adapts to the day-to-day changes life brings us… there we are, still clinging to the past. And we cling to the past until one day we can’t cling to it anymore. And suddenly we feel alienated and unfamiliar with our surroundings. We blame the changes for these feelings but in reality they come from being unable to live in the moment and let go of attachment.

When we don’t get what we want – we suffer. When we get what we don’t want – we suffer. And even when we get exactly what we want, we still suffer because we can’t hold onto it forever. But life is full of changes and the only way for us to live a life free from longing and attachment is to accept those changes day to day, as they happen rather than staying focused on the past.

It’s much the same with people, too.

When we hold on so tightly to the image we have of someone we love that we invest all of our energy and love in them – as long as that image remains our love for them never fades – however, when people change, as they always do, we think we’ve lost the person we once loved. Really, though, we’ve only lost our ability to live in the moment and let go of the past.

It’s hard to let go of the past. That’s why living in the moment is the easiest way to live. When you never form attachments and don’t hold onto the past – you’ll never have to suffer the pain of having to let go.